Jealous moms
This morning the SCMP had an interesting article on when moms get jealous of their helpers. Read it here: http://m.scmp.com/lifestyle/family-education/article/1156136/insight-when-mothers-are-jealous-helpers
A simple way to increase helper productivity
Helpers crashing on their day off
Do you wish that your helper would focus better and not be so forgetful? Do you want her to work with a higher energy level and accomplish more in a shorter period of time? Do you hope to see a gradual improvement in her overall performance, rather than a slow and steady decline? For many helpers, there is a simple way to achieve these productivity goals: MAKE SURE THEY HAVE ADEQUATE REST.
“According to the Human Performance Institute in Florida, improving the quantity and quality of rest is one of the most effective ways to work more efficiently. Basically, when we are rested we think better, can work longer, can concentrate more, are more creative and achieve more.”
1. Avoid frequently interrupting your helper as she works, or constantly redirecting her work. Research says that working in 90 minute bursts boosts productivity. Constant interruptions, whether in the office or home, hurt productivity. If you are a stay at home mom, try not to always interrupt your helper with new tasks. Just because you think of something, doesn't mean you have to say it right away. Write it down, and after she has been able to concentrate on the tasks at hand for 60-90 minutes, then add the new task to her list of things to do, according to its priority.
2. Plan at least 3-4 ten minute breaks during your helper's work day. Regular breaks reduce stress and give the mind time to process and store information. I, personally, find that some of my most productive time is when I take time away from the office. Over a cup of coffee my mind reminds me of important things to do (and I write them down); and I regain a focus on what is most important at that time. Robbing your helper of regular rest times will make her less effective in managing your household affairs.
“Tony Schwartz from The Energy Project has shown that when we take rest seriously we will almost certainly get much more done, our work will be of a higher standard, our thinking will be more accurate, and as a result our incomes are likely to rise.”
3. Treat your helper's sleep as very important. Most adults need 7-8 hours of sleep per night to function at 100% capacity. If your helper works from 6 a.m. to 11 p.m., how much sleep is she getting? Seven hours? NO WAY. She has to shower, wind down from the day, send messages to her loved ones, etc. After all of that she may only sleep 5 hours a day. Over 1 week, her sleep deficit is already 12-14 hours. Now imagine that she is in charge of your 2 year old child. Do you want someone who is chronically short on sleep watching your 2 year old? Would you want this person driving a school bus full of children? If your answer is "no", then you need to change your routine or your demands so that the helper gets adequate rest. A midday nap may be one alternative, but however you achieve it - it needs to be done. You can't cheat nature - we need 7-8 hours of sleep per day to function well. Having a set bed-time (its not just for kids) is helpful, as is sleeping in a dark room. Encourage your helper (wouldn't hurt you either) to turn off her phone and gadgets, and anything that glows or beeps. This will increase REM sleep, and she will awake feeling more rested.
4. Make sure she gets at least one whole day off each week. Don't require your helper to do a lot of chores before she goes on her day off. Most ladies will wash up dishes, and tidy up a bit before leaving for their day off. If you are requiring much more than that, you are only cheating yourself out of an energetic smart helper. One day of rest per week is the minimum required by law. Your helper needs that time to renew her strength and focus.
Is your helper's performance getting better over time OR worse? If it is worsening, one possible factor may be the lack of adequate rest. Why not do an experiment? Make sure your helper gets adequate rest for 30 days, and see if her performance improves. What do you think? Are performance and rest related? Leave us your comments below.
The above tips were based on an article on the importance of rest, that I read on Forbes.com.
Hi, I'm Allan Smith,owner/manager of Arrow Employment Services. I'm married to my high school sweetheart, Ione and we have 2 wonderful daughters and 1 amazing grandson. We love serving HK families by providing them with good helpers, and the support they need to maintain a happy family in our crazy busy Hong Kong.
好雇主，是你嗎？
好僱主，是你嗎？ 林麗琼
常聽到僱主說他們很想聘請一個好家傭。事實上，每位外籍家傭也十分渴望遇到一個好僱主。在銀禧國際菲律賓團契(Jubilee International Filipino Fellowship) 每次主日崇拜開始前，我們都有菲傭基督徒姊妹見證神在她們身上的恩典。我們常會聽到菲傭感謝上帝給他們好僱主。從他們的分享中，我希望你也能發現自己擁有最少一個好僱主的特質，且正在運用它(它們)來管理你的菲傭：
1耐性-- 理解和接受你家傭的弱點和不完美。家傭也是正常人，也會犯錯，特別是在頭三至六個月的適應期，她們犯錯的機會特別多。很多菲傭衷心感謝她們的僱主願意耐心地教導她們、糾正她們、又與她們做工作檢討，給她們機會知道自己在哪方面做好、做得不足或做錯，給她們機會解釋、改過，以致能做得更好，而不是立即終止合約。
2體諒-- 一些菲傭感謝神賜她們有體諒她們的僱主。家傭離鄉別井，來港打工，一方面要適應與家人分離並思郷之苦；另一方面又要適應香港的文化、語言、工作、居住環境、並與一群陌生人一起生活等，會承受很大壓力。有些僱主願意體諒家傭的困難，願意花時間關心、聆聽和敎導。若見家傭工作表現轉差，僱主會先了解其原因，不會只知責怪她們。若知是因家傭家人患病、或遇重大困難等，僱主會安慰、鼓勵她們更要為家人而努力。僱主的體諒，對家傭能否安心工作，關係重大。
3同理心-- 如果你的家傭是第一次到海外工作，我們可以理解到她會很想家、會遇到很多文化衝擊。若她在菲律賓時未做過傭工、不用做家務、不用煮食，在香港的生活、工作真會帶給他們極大的震盪。故此有些新來港的家傭常常「面黑」(面無表情)或常常哭泣，或令自己忙於家務以減少思鄉。有些僱主明白到家傭的限制，不時問候家傭，了解她自己或其家人所遇到的困難。這些僱主的關懷、安慰，可助家傭快點適應香港的生活和工作。
4支持 – 有些菲傭感謝僱主的鼓勵、又盡力安排她們星期六或日放假，讓她們可返敎堂，參與崇拜和事奉、或參加一些有助其個人/靈性成長/提昇工作技能的查經、講座或硏討班等。這些裝備可助菲傭從中獲得更多的信心和力量努力工作，也減少她們思鄉之情。
5慷慨-- 在工作的第一個月，菲傭還未有薪水可領取。有些菲傭居住地點距離我們教會較遠。即使可獲星期六或日放假，有部分人亦因為沒有足夠金錢購買食物和支付交通費而不敢或不能去教堂聚會。但有好些傭工分享，她們感謝其僱主主動給他們零錢，讓她們可到教堂僱敬拜神、參加小組、並接受各方面的培訓。
同時，有些菲傭則感謝僱主不嫌他們能力有限，願為她們報名、付費，讓她們可學習廣東話、英文、煮中國菜或嬰兒護理等，使她們可更有效率、更有信心地工作。
6互相尊重-- 一些菲傭感謝神賜她們好僱主，能教導子女尊重菲傭。僱主同時也在孩子面前樹立良好的榜樣。，們從不呼喝家傭，即使她們做錯事，僱主也不會向他們發脾氣、破口大駡或悪言相向。這些僱主也不會容讓自己的孩子說話/做任何事情戲弄、侮辱家傭。家傭來香港打工，並非做奴隸。她們也是人，也需要感受到人家的尊重。受僱主尊重的家傭通常會工作得更快樂、更能堅持工作至約滿。
7信任-- 中國人有句話：「用人勿疑，疑人勿用。」意思是：要相信你任用的人，不要任用你懷疑的人。信任傭工對於維持長久僱傭關係是非常重要的。有菲傭感謝其僱主信任他們，相信她們說的是真話，而非藉口/謊言。僱主對傭工的信任可直接提昇她們工作的自信心和歸屬感。
8 允許工作有自主權、自由度-- 如果你所聘用的家傭並非第一次做家傭，她們較其他新手傭工需要在工作中有更大之自主權。一些組織、管理能力較強、有主見的家傭，若可讓她們彈性安排家務的優次、步驟，其工作滿足感通常會更大、工作表現更有效率。很多菲傭都不約而同地感激她們的僱主允許他們有自主權、自由度去安排工作。這令她們感到能在其僱主家中工作是幸福的事。
曾有位在香港工作了四年多的菲傭說:「一個好僱主能塑造出一個好家傭。」我衷心祝願所有精薦的僱主都能成為一位好僱主！
.
.
Kathy LAM is an early Arrow customer. Her helper has been with her for almost 5 years now. Kathy is a registered nurse and mother of three children. She teaches infant care, baby massage and breastfeeding.
Are you a good employer?
8 ways to ensure your helper says "Thank God! I have a GOOD employer."
We often hear employers say they want to hire a good helper. In fact, domestic helpers also long to have a good employer. Every week before the Sunday Service, the Filipino helpers (sisters in Christ) in the Jubilee International Church share and witness the grace of God. A lot of helpers thank God for giving them good employers. Below are some items we usually hear from their sharing. I hope you can find yourself having at least one of these, if not all of these "good boss" characteristics.
Be Patient, Understanding and Accept the limitations and weaknesses of your helper- No one is perfect. Domestic helper will make mistakes, especially in the first three to six months. They are really thankful for their employers willing to teach and correct them patiently, give them chance to explain their side, improve, instead of terminating the contract immediately.
Be Empathetic- If this is your helper’s first time to work overseas, it is understandable that she will feel homesick, or have culture shock etc. It can be observed by their lack of facial expression, they look like they want to cry, keep themselves very busy in housework, etc. Sometimes you can ask the helper how she is adjusting to Hong Kong’s life and work. Comfort your helper when necessary.
Be Considerate- a good employer is compassionate, knows how to sympathize when his/her helper is suffering and will have a strong desire to help.
Be Supportive - Helpers praise employers who encourage them to participate or engage in activities for personal and spiritual growth, such as activities offered by some churches or other associations. This will equip the helper to gain more confidence and minimize the feeling of homesickness.
Be Generous- In the first month of work, the helper has not yet received salary.. Some helpers living far away from our church dare not to go to church because they do not have enough money for buying food, paying the transportation fee. But, quite a number of helpers thank God for having generous employers who gave them some pocket money so they can go to church, receive training, worship God, and join in a support group, even if they do not have salary yet.
Respect your Helper- some employers teach their children to respect their helper, and set a good model for the children to follow. They will never shout/yell at the helper even if the helper does something wrong, nor will they let their children say/do anything to insult helper. Helpers, like all humans need to feel that they are being respected, too. Shouting, yelling or screaming will not help the helper to do better, it will only make them often feel frightened of you, cause their performance to worsen and they will begin to think about resignation.
Allow Autonomy at work- If it is not the first time your helper work as helper, it’s good to give your helper more autonomy at work. Allow her arrange the work priority, steps of doing some housework as long as the outcome is good. Sense of freedom and autonomy at work results in your helper being happier, and thus becoming more effective at work.
Trust your helper- there is a Chinese saying, ‘trust the person you hired, do not hire the person if you are in doubt ” Trust is important to keeping a long term relationship. Usually, helpers like to work for those employers who trust them as this increases their confidence at work. Your helper can sense if you trust her or not.
One helper working in Hong Kong for over four years says, “A good employer helps to mold a good helper.” I believe all Arrow’s employers have potential to be a good employer. What do you think? Please give us your feedback.
Cooking Class - not bad! not bad at all!
Last Sunday we had our 2nd cooking class: breaded pork chop and eggplant was on the menu. As the manager of Arrow, I felt a solemn obligation to ensure quality control, :-p so I tasted all the food. It was all good, but the eggplant & beef dish was especially delicious. If you aren't sending your helper for training, please don't complain about her cooking.. I also sat in on part of the Infant care class taught by Kathy Lam. Wow! She imparted a lot of practical knowledge to the ladies who attended.
She said, she said
What do you do when your customer, a Hong Kong person says "it happened this way" and your client, a Filipino worker, says "No, it happened that way"? When a helper leaves her employer before the end of the contract, there are sometimes accusations of poor performance from the employer, and of mistreatment from the employee. Who should we believe? We don't have an investigator in our company (although in a past life, I did work as an investigator). The helper wants another employer and the employer wants another helper. Does the helper deserve another chance? Does the employer deserve another helper?
Helper: "Do we give the helper another chance? introduce her to another family? Will she succeed the 2nd time around if we match her better? At Arrow we let the lady rest for a day to calm her emotions, and then I have my staff, usually Bolen or Kathy debrief the lady to discover what went wrong. We review all of our follow up records and often call the employer for more insight about what happened. If our staff thinks they deserve another chance, we will try and find them a situation better suited to their abilities and personality.
Employer: Do we give the employer another helper? If there really is mal-treatment, can we, in good conscience, put another helper in that home?" 95% of the cases where we give replacements, we don't need any discussion at all. The helper was homesick, did something serious, was obviously treated fairly and given many chances to succeed, etc." But in a small percentage of cases we have to wrestle with this question "does that employer get a 2nd chance?" For example, an employer fires the helper in less than 2 weeks because grandma doesn't like her; OR the helper resigns after one month claiming she is given only leftovers to eat and works til 2-3 a.m. every day; OR we discover the employer has had 5-6 maids in 2 years. Where there is smoke, there is usually fire.
When we receive wildly differing reports from the employer and the employee (she said, she said), we try to debrief both parties, asking them what happened. We review our follow up records, and talk to our staff about their interactions with the HK customer and Filipino client. We look at the employer's record: how many helpers have they had? (not just Arrow). Did their previous helpers finish their contracts? You might say "Wait a minute. I never fired my helpers? Is it my fault they all quit?" The answer is "maybe." Why can't you keep a helper? What is going on that makes them not want to work for you? We ask the helper to tell us what happened. What did the helper say about the employer after she left their employ? We know that may be feeling bitter, so we have to sift through what they say to try and understand what actually happened. We will talk to the employer about it and try to determine: "Was it mostly cultural? miscommunication? or was mal-treatment involved?" And yes, constant verbal haranguing might be abusive. In the vast majority of cases the problem is cultural or related to mis-communication. More importantly, Is the employer coachable? Are they humble enough to accept some advice on how to manage Filipino workers? OR Will supplying another worker, simply result in more verbal abuse and an early resignation?
Recently we have had a customer call up and loudly yell at our office staff. They even started swearing. If they treat us that way, what treatment must their helpers be suffering? When the employee resigns (they almost always will when working for someone with a temper), should we put another helper in an employment situation like that? How do you make a decision?
Arrow: Finally, we look at our role in the relationship. Did we follow up complaints promptly? meet with the helper for coaching? What other things could we do to better serve customers and reduce their stress. For example this month, we are offering cooking classes, Cantonese classes, English classes and Infant care classes for helpers. The cost is $100 for a 2 hour session. We constantly review our 1 week orientation in the Philippines with Ma'am Nely to see what ways we can improve it.
Most of the cases we deal with are pretty clear, but occasionally we're faced with a "she said, she said" situation, where it is very difficult to know what to do. In those cases we especially need wisdom and courage.
How to get your child to sleep
" With my first baby, I discovered that there really is a Land of the Living Dead. It's populated by zombies whose children don't sleep. My son had a voracious appetite, so he (and I) would be up every two hours so he could eat. My daughter was a tough one, too --every time I put her down, she howled like a wet cat. Still, by the time they were toddlers, we were all sleeping through the night pretty well. Then came baby number three. Aidan hatedgoing to bed and woke up every time a breeze blew on Pluto. I didn't sweat it, though --I knew all babies eventually sleep through the night."
The above excerpt is from an excellent article by Holly Robinson on parenting.com. Read the whole article here:
Hong Kong to scrap the levy completely
"Hong Kong may scrap the so-called maids' levy, which was introduced in 2003 but has been on hold since 2008, a Hong Kong news site reported late Friday.
A report on Radio Television Hong Kong (RTHK) cited sources who said Chief Executive C.Y. Leung may make an announcement in his upcoming policy address.
"The waiver on the levy is due to expire in July this year. But sources say Leung will instead announce its scrapping in his policy address next Wednesday, in a bid to ease the financial pressure on Hong Kong's middle-class," it said.
It noted the levy was introduced in October 2003 but put on hold in 2008."
LBG, GMA News
Hong Kong police forum
Today I attended a forum given by HK police on problems commonly faced by Filipino domestic helpers. Jonathan Close senior inspector for Interpol was the speaker. He began by remarking about how safe HK is. There are only 1108 crimes per 100,000 population, which makes us a very safe city. Singapore has a slightly lower crime rate (darn that Singapore! Always beating us by an iota.)
He mentioned that if you are a victim of crime you can report the crime to the police by SMS, fax, phone or in person. The best way is in person at a local police station because then they will arrange a translator. In HK the police make the decision to prosecute a crime or not, so once you make a report, you can't then turn around and say "I don't want to press charges." It is no longer your decision.
If you are arrested you'll be taken to nearby police station and an interpreter provided. You have the right to have a lawyer (at your own expense) or call the consulate for help.
A portion of the talk was about regulations for keeping order at public events like protest marches. Boring stuff for employers, but helpful to groups like churches (we have our own Jubilee church) Gatherings of 10 or more people in public don't have to reported to the police. Religious gatherings don't have to be reported unless there are more than 50 people. If there are more than 50 people, the police should be notified. In private premises you can have up to 500 people before the police need to be notified. A procession is a group that is moving along public roads. If you have more than 30 people on a public highway you need to notify the police in advance by 7 days notice.
Inspector Close devoted a large section to drugs, obviously wanting to discourage people against drug use or trafficking. When it came to human trafficking, he said that prostitution was legal in HK, but many other activities (like advertising for sex) associated with prostitution were illegal. And, of course, doing any kind of work, on a domestic helper visa is illegal and will likely result in arrest, incarceration and deportation. We've never had a case of an Arrow lady acting as a prostitute. Most of our ladies are recommended by other ladies, so they have a strong support network, that helps them in time of desperate need, so they won't have to turn to something like prostitution.
One of the dark subjects covered was "what happens if you die in HK?" Turns out, the body is taken to the mortuary, id'd by friend or family member. The coroner decides whether an autopsy is needed (in most cases Not), and when all procedures are finished the body is released to family.
In the Q&A time, a lady asked about Filipinos who use their passports as collateral at loan sharks to get loans, and then tell the police that they lost their passport. What to do? The room erupted in laughter when she let slip that she her motive was that she was the guarantor on loans for other people. Duh! The Inspector pointed out that the rear cover of the passport states that it is the property of the Philippine government, and is NOT to be given into the possession of any other person. He pointed out that with another person's passport it would be relatively simple to get other information about them, take out credit cards in their names, and commit Identity theft. The message from the police department was, keep your travel documents in your own possession. If you are holding your helper's passport, remember
- It is the property of the Philippines government and they are breaching the conditions of the passport when they give it to you.
- They can, on their day off, simply report it as lost, pay a fee and get another one; leaving you holding a useless document.
At Arrow, we will include information about the Identity Theft, and safe passport handling in our briefings. Safekeeping a helper's passport for her can be helpful as long as she fully agrees, has easy access to it when she needs it, and doesn't feel compelled to do so as a condition of work. Your employee should not have to argue with you to gain access to her travel documents.
Toxic work environment
"the work is so easy, but the job is so difficult because my employers constantly attack me emotionally" From a testimony at Jubilee church.
What kind of work environment is your home?
如何幫助我們的傭工在冬季照顧嬰兒/兒童
在冬季，很多雇主經常抱怨他們來自菲律賓的傭工，沒有給他們的孩子穿足夠的衣服，導致他們的孩子著涼。為何類似的投訴如此普遍？這問題可如何改善呢？
由於菲律賓是一個在熱帶國家，那裡的人從來沒有經歷冬天。故此, 正常、新來港的菲傭都缺乏知識,不明白冬天季節的變化與孩子健康多的關係，如: 睡覺/外出時,應為嬰兒/兒童穿多少件、多厚的衣服。若在香港土生土長的雇主期望菲傭能立即掌握、明白如何在冬季照顧少主人的衣著,以避免令他們著涼,那恐怕是不切實際的期望。
然而，作為雇主的我們,應如何導我們的菲傭更有效地在冬季照顧我們的孩子,不致因人為疏忽而著涼、生病？下面的一些知識，我們應該耐心地教我們的傭工：
如何檢查孩子，確保他們穿足夠保溫的衣物
- 檢查嬰兒/兒童頸背和/或腳(板)底。如果孩子有足量夠溫暖，當觸摸他們的頸背/腳(板)底時,它們都應是溫暖的。如果孩子的頸背/腳(板)底是冰冷的，這意味著他們身體不夠溫暖，我們應該立即幫助他們加穿衣服。
- 平日放一條小毛巾在孩子的頸背。如果孩子們太熱了，出汗，小毛巾可以吸收的汗水。我們只需更換孩子背部的小毛巾，他們便沒那麼容易因為大人未能及時替他們更換被汗弄濕的衣服而著涼。
- 如果菲傭與孩子在同一個房間睡，應教菲傭在睡覺前，檢查孩子童頸背和腳(板)底。若孩子童頸背有汗水/背部的毛巾是濕的，菲傭應替他們更換頸背的毛巾。如果孩子的頸背及腳是冰冷的，菲傭應替他們幫助他們穿上襪子、加衣服/蓋被。當然，雇主應敎菲傭，她們若不清楚應替孩子加蓋被子，或是加穿多少衣服/哪件衣服，應直接問雇主。
我們也有責任教導菲傭，在不同季節、氣溫下，應替孩子穿多少、多厚的衣服；甚麼衣服/外套只可讓孩子在家穿，甚麼衣服/外套只可讓孩子外出時穿。
- 我們應該教菲傭，若孩子們外出，必須給他們準備好外套/包被(孩子們的衣服,特別是外出時穿的，最好是雇主預先選定，這可避免菲傭因準備了不合雇主心意的衣服而引起不快)。
- 在冬季，不論室內還是在室內，菲傭應不時檢查孩子們的頸背。這可確保孩子若是太熱、冒汗，菲傭可儘快協助他們脫下外套，以防他們不會穿過多衣服。同時也可減少孩子因穿衣不足而著涼之機會。
如何防止嬰兒在洗澡時著涼
- 保持室內溫暖: 在冬季，關閉(你將要給嬰兒洗澡、更換衣服的)房間裡所有的窗。若家中有調較室溫功能,可把室溫調較至25 ºC左右。
- 必須在放水在嬰兒浴盆前，,準備好所有嬰兒洗澡須用之物品。雇主應給菲傭一張嬰兒洗澡的清單，並把它張貼在廁所或嬰兒的房間，讓菲傭時刻都清楚嬰兒洗澡前要預備好什麼物品，然後才去較水。
- 必須試過水溫，才可開始替嬰兒洗澡。如果你有一個浴缸溫度計，水溫應為36-38ºC。另一有效測試水溫的方法:用手肘(elbow) 浸泡在水中，試水的溫度。若手肘認為，水是夠溫暖的，這意味著水是適合嬰兒洗澡。
- 當一切準備好，這才抱起嬰兒，檢查的尿布，若有大便，立刻替其清理。然後才為嬰兒脫下衣服，立即給嬰兒洗澡。
- 限制嬰兒洗澡的時間。由為嬰兒脫下所有的衣服，到用乾毛巾包裹洗澡後的嬰兒，整個過程應在5-10分鐘內完成。若讓嬰兒坐在水中超過10分鐘，時間太長，這可能會嬰兒著涼，也令嬰兒皮膚變得更乾燥。
- 如果我們希望菲傭為嬰兒洗澡時，使用電暖爐，必先確保家裡的電暖爐是安全的。雇主有責任清楚說明如何使用電暖爐、為嬰兒洗澡時，電暖爐應放在哪裡、注意事項和不安全使用時可能引致什麼後果等。
當然，孩子是上天賜給父母的禮物。我鼓勵作為父母的雇主，不要輕易把為嬰兒洗澡這寶貴親子時段，輕易交給菲傭(除非你真的太累、太晚才回家或生病)。父母與孩子關係之建立，實有賴日常為孩子洗澡、換片；與傾談、玩耍等生活瑣事中, 共同累積美好回億。菲傭可以成為得力的好幫手，但是需要時間和耐心教導。作為雇主，讓我們成為好雇主，為自己在家訓練一個的能幹，專業的菲傭。
冬天來了，衷心祝福所有雇主與菲傭合作愉快、相處融洽。
Kathy Lam是一個早期的精薦顧客。她的傭工已經和她生活接近五年。她是一名註冊護士和三個孩子的母親。在精薦，她負責支援僱主或家長。另外，她在一家私人公司教嬰兒護理和母乳餵哺，她以母乳餵哺自己的三個孩子共七年。如果你想在母乳餵哺有更多訓練，聯絡我們，她會致電給你及介紹她的服務及所需費用。
How to help your helper to take good care of your children during the Winter
by Kathy Lam
In winter, employers with babies/kids often complain that their helpers from the Philippines are not keeping their kids warm enough, which results in their kids getting cold and may even necessitate a visit to see doctor.
Why is this phenomenon so common? Can it be improved?
The Philippines is a country in the tropics, and most of the people there have never experienced winter. It is normal for the helper to lack awareness about weather change and how it may effect the health of the kids. They naturally won't know how many clothes they should help the kids to put on before bed, when going out, or how to control the environment at home during bath time. It is unrealistic to expect them to be as conscious about this as Hong Kong people are, because we have experienced winter since birth!
What can we do to equip our helper(s) to take care of our kids better in winter? Below are some skills we should teach our helpers patiently:
Teach them how to check the temperature of our babies/children
- check the nape of their neck and/or the bottom of their feet. If the child is warm enough, their nape/sole should always be warm when touched. If their nape/soles are cold, then the child is not warm enough, and we should help them to put on more clothes.
- It's a good idea to put a towel on our babies/kids'back all the time, so if they are too hot and sweat, the towel can absorb the sweat, and we can just change to a fresh towel as needed. Our babies/kids will be less likely to get cold because of the sweat.
- If the helper sleeps with the children in the same room, teach them to check the child's nape and soles before the helper goes to bed herself. If they are sweaty, change the towel on their back. If the child's feet are cold, help them to put on socks.
Teach them how to dress the children for different temperatures and weather conditions
- Teach your helper what kind of / how many clothes we should help our babies to put on at home or when they go out in different temperature.
- We should teach our helpers, that they MUST bring jacket/baby blanket for babies/kids whenever they go out, no matter what season is. In winter, helper should be taught also to check regularly the temperature of the babies/kids to make sure they are not too hot and sweat when they are indoor. Assist the babies/kids to take off the jacket if they are too hot.
Bathing Tips
Your helper also needs to know how to prevent the babies/kids from getting cold when bathing them.
- In winter: close all the windows in the room where you are going to bath the babies /kids and help them to change clothes.
- All the things for baby bath must be prepared well and put properly in the right place before preparing the water for bathing. It's highly recommended for employers to make a checklist of baby bath essentials for our helpers, paste it either in the toilet or baby's room, so that they are clear on what to prepare and organize the things better.
- Keep the room warm and bath water comfortably warm but not hot. If you have a bath thermometer, warm the water to about 37 degreesº C. Or you can check the water temperature by immersing your elbow in the water. If your elbow feel that the water is warm enough, it means the water is suitable for bathing a baby
- When everything is prepared, check the diaper before removing baby's clothes. After removing baby's clothes, bath baby immediately.
- Limit the time of baby bath. From removing all baby's clothes to wrapping the baby with dry towel after bathing : 5-10 minutes only. Letting baby sit in the water for over 10 minutes is too long, as baby may get cold.
- If you want your helper to use an electric heater when bathing your baby, make sure the heater is safe to use. It is the employer's responsibility to teach the helper clearly where the heater should be put, how to use it, precautions when using it and when should the helper should be turned it on/off.
Winter is coming, I hope all Arrows'employers are happy with our Arrows' ladies' performance. It takes time for an ordinary helper to become a good helper. As employers, we can contribute a lot in molding a good, capable and professional helper.
Kathy LAM is an early Arrow customer. Her helper has been with her for almost 5 years now. Kathy is a registered nurse and mother of three children. She works at Arrow as a coach for employers and parents. She teaches infant care and breastfeeding for private companies, and breastfed her own 3 children for a total of 7 years. If you would like some coaching in breastfeeding, contact us and Kathy will call you back to introduce her service & fees, etc.
新工作的第一天
還記得你的第一次踏入新校園!你新工作的第一天!很多來自菲律賓初來報到的傭工剛開始時也感到謊張和顧慮，她們當中也會聽過一些關於傭工在港工作的故事，例如嚴格和苛刻的香港僱主。正如香港僱主也常聽到 ' 懶惰和偷窺的菲傭 ' 一樣大家也會心存不安我們作為她們的牧師與導師常教導她們，建立一個好開始和帶著正面的態度作為僱主，我們相信你亦希望給予你新的傭工一個好印象以下有幾個提議:
1. 友善歡迎 很多傭工最憂慮的情況是有一位苛刻的傭主，她們抵達香港後，精薦安排她們一個抵達港後牧師簡報會，幫助她們了解香港文化和撫慰她們的擔憂，僱主亦可幫忙她們一個親切的歡迎解除她們的第一障礙。
2. 良好的溝通 對她們的工作有所回應( 請參考給予傭工適當的反映之文章 ) 對於她們良好的表現可多加讚揚， 她們在首個工作月時常會自我調整，希望了解僱主的家庭工作標準，清晰地讓她知道你的理想工作方式。
3. 清晰的指引 給她明確的指示，特別在她主要的工作範疇上需強調指導她們如何對應危急的情況，在何處可找到幫忙，如果使用家中的電話和寫下所以聯絡人的電話號碼。讓她知道哪裡可找到她的需要如飢餓時可在哪找到食物或哪些時段可用她的手機。
4. 一天恰當的休息 神說" 六天工作，第七天休息。" 安息日的原意是以一天的時間來重新建立自我以從中成長。傭工用她們的安息日與家庭聯絡，存款回家，與朋友相聚，出席聚會或到教會崇拜，抑或只簡單的休養一天，給她完整的一天休息是十分重要的。我們鼓勵她們在假日中盡量善用和參與精薦之教會聚會，聚會當中牧師會引導她們聖經的真理和生活價值。此外，精薦亦提供烹飪和在港理財之道等聚會。
5 幫助她成長 離鄉別井去重新適應新環境更需投入新工作是一步很大的踏出。她完成一天的工作後，請讓她好好地作息，給她們一些私人時間看書或學一些新事物。精薦跟菲律賓的合作夥伴給她們聖經，烹飪書和每天精神食糧小冊子，我們希望她們最少花三十分鐘的時間細閱這些讀物。僱主亦可以借她一些有啟發性的書籍與雜誌學習可以這些資源將變成浪費品若她不能得到私人空間。
保持寬容和明確的態度去引導你的傭工融入你的家庭中將對未來的生活大有幫助，我們希望你能建立一個健康的關係，從而繼續發展成一種默契。
Your helper might be thinking about resigning
Your helper is probably thinking about resigning. October is the high season for helper resignations. During the Fall season homesickness is at its peak. Christmas is the biggest holiday of the year for Filipinos, and the desire to be home with their loved ones is VERY high. In order to be home for Christmas, helpers will give 30 days notice in October. Your helper probably has some friends who are resigning, so that will increase her feelings of loneliness and isolation. What can you do as an employer, starting now, to help your helper handle her homesickness?
Understand the Push/Pull factors
When an overseas worker decides to resign it is because the combination of push and pull factors are too high. Push and pull factors are things that might pull her home (e.g., homesickness) or push her to go home (e.g. mistreatment). Here are some common push/ pull factors.
| Push Factors | Pull Factors |
| not enough food | misses her family |
| not enough sleep | her children are struggling in school |
| not enough affirmation | her husband says "I really miss you." |
| employer is critical | former employer in Phil says "come back, we need you" |
| employer shouts | illness in her family |
| your kids disrespectful to her | her own kids cry and say "where are you mommy?" |
As employers, we can't control pull factors, but we have great influence over push factors. In most cases pull factors will not be enough to cause a resignation, but if you add one or two push factors - well - that's a different story.
Treat her with dignity and politeness
If you frequently challenge your helper to strive harder, to clean more thoroughly, work faster -- she will think you are impossible to satisfy and want to give up. If you often communicate in an emotional or angry way, it is very doubtful your helper will complete her contract, and you are at serious risk of her resigning this month. Make October your "helper appreciation month" and look for ways to affirm and encourage her.
Suggestions
- Talk about Christmas and how she celebrates at home. Ask her what her plans are.
- Talk to your employee about how calls home effect her: Do they make her feel more homesick or give her relief? If they only serve to make her more homesick, then too many calls home could be counter-productive.
- Think through some additional or seasonal jobs she could do, and ask her to do them when she has finished her normal chores. Staying busy with meaningful work helps prevent homesickness. Lots of idle time will cause the helper to think a lot about home and her family. Cleaning out seldom used cupboards, re-organizing a storage area, organizing recipes, menu planning, etc. - activities that require thinking will help keep her focus off of the Philippines.
- Arrange for her to SKYPE or call her family for a long talk at Christmas (at your expense). Purchasing a long distance call card can also achieve this end.
- Make sure she has the day off to go to church and spend with her friends.
- Give her some decorations for her room or bedspace.
- Make a secret Santa gift exchange within your family. Each family member draws a name to buy one gift for that person and make a limit on the amount to spend. ($20-25)
- Ask her to cook one of the dishes that is normally served back at home to let your family taste.
- Go out at night time to see the Christmas decorations with the children and let her share this experience with your family.
We hope that both you and your helper will have a happy holiday season.
Allan and Ione, Arrow Employment Services
您的傭工可能會考慮辭職
您的助手可能會想辭職。尤其在十月分，這是傭工辭職的高峰期。在秋季的思鄉之情是在其高峰期。聖誕節對菲律賓人來說是全年一個重大的節日，同時她們想回鄉與家人其渡節日我渴望也是特別高的。為了能夠回家過聖誕節，助手將在十月提前三十天的通知。您的傭中可能有些朋友已經提出辭職，這樣會增加她們的孤獨和寂寞的感覺。從今開始，作為僱主你應該如何協助您的傭工面對她們的思鄉情緒呢？
了解推/拉因素
當一個海外工人決定辭職，是因為推拉因素的結合過高。推拉因素是包括一些拉她回家的因素（例如，思鄉之情），或推她回家的因素（例如虐待）。下面是一些常見的推/拉因素。
作為雇主，我們無法控制的拉動因素，但我們有權改變推動因素。在大多數情況下拉動因素並不足以構成傭工的辭職，但如果您有效地加添一至兩個推動因素，這會是兩碼子的事。
以尊重和禮服對待她
如果你經常要求你的傭工更加努力工作，清潔得更徹底，工作速度更快 - 她會認為你是不可能被滿足及想放棄。如果你經常以情緒化及憤怒地和你的傭工溝通，這會令人懷疑你的傭工會否可能完成她的合約，並你會務著她會在今個月內請辭。將十月成為您的"傭工欣賞月"，尋找方法去肯定及讚揚您的傭工。
建議
- 談論聖誕節及問她會如何慶祝聖誕。問她有什麼計劃。
- 討論當您的傭工致電回家時對她的影響 : 致電家人會令她們更思鄉或是能夠舒緩她的思 鄉情緒。
- 如果他們只會讓她更想家，那太多的致電回家是產生反生產力的效果。
- 考慮一些額外及季節性的工作她能夠做到，當她們完成日常瑣事後要求她們去完成。保持忙碌地完成有意義的工作，有助於防止思鄉之情。大量的空閒時間，會令到您的傭工懷念自己的家鄉及家人。清理很少使用的櫥櫃，重新組織一個存儲區域，組織的食譜，菜單設計等活動 - 需要用上思考我工作能夠令她們不專注在菲律賓的事情。
- 安排她在聖誕節使用SKYPE或打電話回家鄉，可以讓她談久一(在你的費用)。購買長途電話卡，也可以達到這個目的。
- 確保她有一天假期去教堂並和她的朋友們一起度過。
- 給她一些裝飾讓她去裝飾她的房間或床位。
- 舉行一個神秘的聖誕禮物交換活動。每個家庭成員都抽出一個名字並為其買一份禮物，但要限制於一個限額內。（20-25港幣）
- 請她烹調一味她在家鄉經常會煮的餸菜，讓你的家人品嚐。
- 在晚上的時間與孩子們外出欣賞聖誕燈飾，並讓她向你們分享這次經驗。
我們希望您和您的傭工會有一個快樂的節日。
7 ways to bond with your baby
Parenting.com has a fantastic article by a pediatrician on how to bond with your newborn. Here's an excerpt:
" Early in our parenting career, a friend said to my wife, Martha, "It must be nice to be married to a pediatrician since he knows all about babies." Martha astutely responded, "Actually, he mainly knows how to take care of sick babies."
She was right: I had been well-trained in treating physical illnesses but had little experience in promoting emotional wellness. So I turned my office into sort of an experimental laboratory, watching those parents who seemed to enjoy their babies most and, admittedly, whose children I enjoyed most. After 10 years of observations, I came up with the concept of attachment parenting (AP), a high-touch, high-response style of parenting that I believe brings out the best in both you and your baby."
Keep reading: http://www.parenting.com/article/7-ways-to-bond-with-your-baby?src=twitter
10 Commandments for Employers
Customer's often give me lists of dos/don't s, rules for their new helpers. We pass these onto the helpers so they will understand the expectations of their employers. Recently I had a group of recently "resigned" helpers in the office. They had each worked at their employers homes for different lengths of time (3 months, 6 months, 1 year, etc.) I asked them to write a list of dos/don't for employers, and then condense them into 10 commandments for employers. Here is their un-edited 10 commandments.
- Don't humiliate the helpers.
- Don't discriminate the helpers.
- Don't treat the maids like a dog.
- Give trust, humility and feel that the maids are safe in working with their employers. (I think they meant "make the maids feel safe")
- Give food at least 3 times a day.
- Give maid proper place and space to rest after work.
- Don't expect the maid to be perfect.
- Let the maid to feel free to move inside the house to work well.
- Employers have to give time to the helper to adjust and adapt the terms and regulations before termination.
- Don't control the life of the maid.
The secret to a high performing helper
Dr. Jorge De Ramos is Senior Pastor of Jubilee Int'l Filipino Fellowship
Do you want a helper who keeps a high level of performance working in your home? Do you want her to be motivated in a way that she begins to take initiative in her work and does it cheerfully, no matter how hard the work may be?
I noticed that high performing helpers are those who are given a good dose of affirmation on their work. I have heard and seen it countless times from stories shared in our faith community of Filipino migrant workers; they are genuinely delighted when they hear a word of affirmation and appreciation from their employers. To them it was enough to make their day and even their week it is more than what money could buy for them.
Affirmation helps a worker see if she is doing things well and to the satisfaction of the employer. It adds confidence to the worker on her work and even do better. It makes her happy in way that helps her cope with homesickness. A word of appreciation will keep her from wearing down emotionally.
How do we affirm our helper?
When ever she finishes a job, mention the things that she did right and well. Say it to her like: “I enjoyed the steamed fish tonight.”
Add a word of gratitude like, “thanks for keeping my child safe on your way home.”
When you feel relaxed coming home to a tidy place, say a word of thanks for keeping the house in place.
Reciprocate your helper’s greeting. When she greets you “good morning,” reply back to her with the same words.
Affirmation and appreciation can never be excessive as most people experience affirmation deficit in their lives. It is not true that appreciating your worker will cause them to be mediocre. Mediocrity is often caused by a lack of an affirmative working environment. Many of those who resigned from their jobs earlier than expected, have serious deficit of affirmation. Part of what we do as pastors is to help them regain their sense of dignity and self-respect after being in a diificult work environment.
Do not treat affirmation like a commodity or money. For a word of affirmation to make a good impact, it must be given freely and without noting it down as if a debt is occured. Give it from a sincere heart and you will receive a heartfelt service from the one who works for you.
Learn to live an affirmative lifestyle. See what is good, beautiful, positive and delightful with the people around you. Mention it to them with a sincere heart. I am sure your spouse, your children and your friends will truly find it delightful. An admonition from ancient wisdom goes this way: “encourage one another and build each other up.”
When you don't like the person you work with
What do you do if you can't stand your employer, employee or co-worker? Peter Bregman in the Harvard Business Review has an interesting article on how to handle such a situation. Here is a link to this insightful article. What do you think? Leave your comments below.
Pimples - come on!
We had a very qualified lady who has been rejected by three customers who said they really like her, but don't like the pimples on her chin. What a shame. How many HK youth are pimple faced? How many of us have struggled with pimples in our past? If you have a job you can buy medicine to take care of the pimples, but how will you gain the experience, education and other skills needed to care for a family?
It's okay if a customer doesn't like the appearance of an applicant, but please don't ask them to lean into the camera so you can examine her skin/teeth etc. in detail. It's like forcing someone with crooked teeth to smile big, so you can look inside their mouth.